I’m Taking my Time

When talking to friends or family, the two things I am most embarrassed to admit is wanting to take my time and wanting to think things through. If I tell them that I’m not completely fulfilled with an aspect of my life, their reaction is that I should do something to change it NOW. However, I have often felt resistance to this, feeling, instead, that in some situations I would prefer to observe, rather than act.

I am currently looking for a new professional opportunity and it is likely that I will move to a new city for it. In reaction to this situation, my family members are all telling me that I need to act quickly and make a decision very soon because “time is flying past, and before you know it you will be old/poor/unemployable/insert other unrealistic catastrophic situations”. As soon as I hear them telling me this, my chest tightens and I am immediately filled with stress. I am not ready to act now, because I do not yet know the best decision for myself. If I am to change my whole life and move to another city or country again, I want to make sure that it is for the best of reasons.

When I tell my family that “I need time to think things through”, I get the equally stress-provoking question “Well, how long do you think you’ll be thinking about this?”, as if we could put a time limit to deciding the best path for our future, in the same way that we can predict how long it will take us to wash the dishes or take a shower. In my current situation, it’s not so much the fact of having to make a change that is stressful, but the fact that the people close to me are expecting me to make a good (in their opinion) change very quickly.

I have never been advised to take my time and think things through thoroughly and so I have always felt like there was something ‘wrong’ with me when I was reluctant to take immediate action in a situation. I was therefore extremely relieved when I heard Jean Haner telling Nancy Levin, in an interview at the Hay House World Summit, that for her this was a year for planning and thinking, rather than change. This was the first time I had heard somebody advising someone else TO TAKE THEIR TIME. And I suddenly realised that it is ok for us to be still, it is ok for us to think things out and do things calmly. This revelation, this confirmation of my own beliefs, changed my whole attitude to my current life situation.

Yes, there are certain aspects of my life that I would like to change SOON, but NOW I will take my time to think through these changes and to find the best solution for myself. I will allow myself silence and stillness, to listen to what I truly want, rather than precipitating towards what I think I should be doing. And I will say, happily and confidently, to anyone who asks about how things are developing that “I’m taking the time to think things through”.